Life And Dating

Today is kind of weird for me…Well, not really weird, just emotionally draining. I’m sure most of you have experienced something like this; where tears just start falling down your eyes even when you don’t know no the reason why.

I’m not from a rich family or usually have money whenever I want; I’m just a very content person. Sometimes I have money, sometimes I don’t; when I do, I make the most of it (well not all the time; I remember when I was in primary school and my dad’s friend gave my siblings and I fifty naira –back when Nigerian money had value, and I lavished it on candy. My dad whooped my ass that day and I don’t think I lavished money like that anymore. Other time was in the university; the truth is we never had pocket money growing up, my “pocket money” was whatever was left from my school bills – my dad gave money sometimes though.

Or as some would say out of work…Really it’s okay and I am not writing this cause i was unemployed and currently unemployed, I’m writing this cause I am unemployed and it’s my second time. Being jobless is not an easy task or experience but at some point in life, we fall, we rise…it’s a roller coaster. So it’s safe to say I’m clearly in the fall, waiting and hoping for the rise. You know, being jobless not once but twice is not a beautiful experience; you are tired, worn out, confused, scared, unmotivated and just want to give up. But to be able to be successful, you have to be resilient, determined, take life by the throat or it ‘life’ would take your throat!!!

The Rich Guy (Cont'd) I went home that night thinking, how did I meet such a rich and stable guy; the truth is ,apart from my university boyfriend   (well, there’s not much expectation there),the guys I have been dating have been either broke and just entering the labor force or are already working but still living with their parents. No one had a stable job, a fenced duplex …just very comfortable.  

The Rich Guy And then there are the ones that have money and feel like their money should speak for them, that they don’t have to do anything. They either take you on a date and brag about their money or take you to their offices, homes and on their exotic cars. Then when the relationship doesn’t go well, they say you are a gold digger. What do you expect? You just showed her that you can provide for her that you are the “man”. Don’t get me wrong, we all love money, but it’s not everything .

We all say we want commitment, you know a man that can commit. But then, what does this commitment mean to us exactly? What is our definition of commitment? We date a fun guy that maybe his own definition of commitment is taking a woman or his lady, on several dates and when I mean date, i mean lots of dates so he could get in bed with her or probably she could use her initiative and give him what he wants.

The next morning was a Sunday, while I was asleep ,he was on call with his sister (while we were dating ,he was really close to his sisters, so close it was kind of a deal breaker). After his call, we continued our conversation on where this could go and I played the good girl saying; “I don’t want to be the girl that comes between two people” and besides he was just in Lagos for a training and would be back to port Harcourt.   And I’m not quite good with distant relationship, he wasn’t saying much as usual and i was just blabbing to avoid the awkwardness. I left his hotel at twelve noon and in the bus, I was thinking about him and how I have missed him and wanted to be with him.